Resolution to honor Margot from State of Texas

Yesterday we received a letter and certificate from Allen Vaught and the State of Texas House of Representatives.  Both documents are very touching.  I hope that you can read them pictured here.

Daniel and I were unsure what this was, exactly.  So we asked our political expert, Kathleen , who replied:

As a matter of personal privilege, state senators and representatives may bring up a resolution (a statement, not a proposal of law) to honor someone, a group, etc.

This means that Rep. Vaught (whom I have met, he's a nice man not that much older than us) or one of his constituents had the idea to honor Margot and made it happen.   

I think this is really thoughtful.  I'm trying to get my words together to thank all of you properly as soon as I can.

Fall Garden

I've sowed the seeds for the fall garden and so far everything has come up as planned.  Spinach, cucumber, lettuce, bok choy and carrots.  My thyme and basil are still doing well and I have three surprise jalapeños.  I also have surprise tomatoes blooming away.  More blooms than this summer!  If they'll get a rush on the fruit production and the bugs stay at bay I'll have a nice fall batch of tomatoes.

Small Paintings

I started a watercolor series for Margot's room that didn't get finished. It's taking on a new direction. They are titled according to the text I used.


"Can you hear me now?"


"Hey, that's no way to say goodbye."


"Intuition takes me there. Intuition takes me everywhere."




"It will never be over."


"I realized it's only a condition of seeing things that way."

Want Want Want Want

Quizzes by Quibblo.com

Torn

Kathleen asked me how I felt about the Boy Scouts anti-gay policy. I had no idea what she was talking about.  When I looked it up I found, among many items, this Wikipedia article.

I had no idea they prohibited atheists, agnostics and homosexuals.  If you admit to being gay or godless, you're out. I'm shocked.  I love Cub Scouts and now it feels awful.  I can't support these ideas.  But have you seen Penn?  He loves it.  It would break his heart to pull him out.

The Girl Scouts have an open non-discrimination policy.  I think it's shameful the Boy Scouts don't promote the same wisdom.

I'm pissed and torn.

In a world of generic nonsense, there are people who have real words.

The continued flow of paperwork draws out the tragedy of losing Margot unnecessarily.


I needed some information from her last attending doctor at Children's.  We emailed regarding that information, but in between he had these beautiful words:

...I think often about Margot, you, her dad. I cannot imagine where you find the strength to face a new day after losing her. I started to look at your blog, but had to stop. Although it takes some training, it's very easy to provide intensive care. In contrast, it is immeasurably difficult to reside in someone else's pain...

...Please take care of yourself and each other. We don't get to choose how long we spend with our loved ones, but we do get to choose how to love them. You clearly know how to love, and with that gift, you, too, will save lives...

His love and humanity are as valuable an asset as his medical care.  Despite our bottomless heartache, I feel so
very fortunate to know him.

Penn's selling Popcorn for Cub Scout Pack 54

Penn had his first Cub Scout meeting this week. On the downside, the first thing we have to do is a fundraiser. I hate fundraisers. Don't tell anyone, but I trash about 90% of the brochures we are asked to pitch for our various activities. I can't buy crap myself and I can't bring myself to ask someone to buy junk, no matter the cause.

But the Cub Scout Popcorn isn't junk, over 70% goes to our scouts, Cub Scouts is a great program for kids and for reasons beyond me, Penn really likes selling popcorn.  He's sold $350 worth so far.

You could click here to buy from him online.  But it's not the same prices as the brochure. If you would rather buy from the more affordable brochure just pick out what you want from below (click here to see it bigger), note the price and then click the "Donate Button." Enter your price, shipping address and the name of what you are ordering in the notes portion and your popcorn will come right to you!  Any questions email me at CarissaByers@gmail.com.

Penn and the First Grade

Penn after school.

First grade is fully underway now.  Penn likes his teacher.  It was described to us, "Getting Ms. W. is like winning the lottery of first grade teachers."  He remains academically and socially successful and comfortable and is really proud of all the work he brings home.  We have a great deal of support at the school.

The kids play on the playground after school for as long as anyone has time for. We parents hang out under the trees and chat about ourselves.  There is a group of us who all started kindergarten together that I feel really lucky to have as friends.  We are the last ones to leave every day.  In my head this small group of really cool little boys grow up together all coming-of-age-movie-musical-montage style and we all stay friends forever.

Penn is officially a Cub Scout and is in the same den with previously mentioned very cool boys.  He is beyond excited about this.  So am I.  Nostalgia beckons Daniel to feel the same.

On the swings.

He's hanging in there and appears both remarkably strong and empathetic.  He expresses his sadness about Margot freely and experiences the loss at a much deeper level than we anticipated.  Before school started, we talked about all of the things he can do if he gets sad at school. Recently, I asked Penn what he does at school when he gets sad.  He says he mostly gets sad when he thinks about her and he won't let himself think about her at school because he doesn't want to cry in front of his friends, so he just stays busy.

Funny, I do the same thing.

Doing homework.

Margot is not just an "absence" for him, but a hole as big and empty as our own.   She was his sister and they adored one another.  He seems to be progressing in a very healthy state, for which I am so grateful.  He is "grateful" for her every night before bed.  He says, "I want to be a scientist and build a time machine when I grow up so I can go back and take away the apple."  When he says things like that that bring tears to my eyes he just gets it and hugs me.   

I spend a great deal more time with him now.  I go see him at school even when I just send him on to someone's house for a play date.  The tiny things that used to drive me crazy are no longer so annoying.  I am just so happy he is here.

Found a frog.

First day of school parents.

The Good Leaders

I found this in a blog post at "Easily Amused." 

This list makes me sad.  Our society often fails dramatically when trying to empower women.  First and foremost, you do not empower a woman by teaching her how to be like a man.

Sitting around with your legs spread, always getting the last word, doing whatever you want without asking if anyone minds, never apologizing, playing unfair, always needing credit for every last thing (which I personally find really obnoxious) and firmly pumping everyone's hand, etc. is just ridiculous.  These are not qualities of a good leader or a good man, for that matter.

No person can fake their way to be a remarkable leader through learned gestures.  Learned gestures are what we teach monkeys to do for our amusement.

What erodes a woman's self confidence is not apologizing, it's buying this book.

Good leaders of all genders will be genuine people who lead because they are good at it.  Because they are smart and passionate and compassionate and better at it than any one else.  They will be good leaders because they believe in the goal and the message and because they can communicate and motivate people.  They will be good leaders regardless of how many pats on the back they get or how much they get paid. The Good Leaders will be successful regardless of their hand strength and regardless of what hangs or does not hang between their legs.

The Good Leaders are equipped with good grammar. Especially when publishing a book so as to avoid "not get taken seriously."

$533 PER WEEK

I currently have 19 items checked out from the library and 23 hold requests.  I make about two trips per week to keep all of us full of books and a movie or two.   If I were to estimate the average hardcover book at a low $15 and the average cost of a movie rental at a low $4 and I averaged 35 books and 2 movies per week (which might also be kind of low) I WOULD SPEND $533 DOLLARS PER WEEK.

But I don't have to spend $533 dollars per week because I love the library.  I have my fill of fiction, gardening, crocheting and the occasional photography or art book.  Penn gets at least three brand new stories every day.  (Two that I read and one that he reads.)  Daniel has lots of graphic novel finds.  And we can watch any movie or television series we want.  For free.  It also fulfills my need to not buy or have a lot of stuff.

Even better, I reserve everything online and the library emails me when it's ready to pick up. I don't even have to browse.  And on the rare occasion they don't have what I'm looking for, I am able to suggest that they purchase it.  All from the convenience of my office.

Libraries have always been a magical treasure for me. I think Daniel and I just decided to make the library our destination for charitable goods.  Just a suggestion.  

My recent good reads were "The Help," "Of Bees and Mist,"  "Gun with Occasional Music," Her Fearful Symmetry" and "The Time Travelers Wife."

A New Addiction

We have had so many offers of kindness extended to us.  Among those was the unique offer to borrow David and Carrie's kayaks.  David met us by the lake and shoved us off.  We paddled across and to the bathhouse and until Daniel said it was time to go home.  I wonder how long I would stay out there before I actually got tired of it.

To the cutest couple evers, thank you!

*All photos taken with my phone.

The Family that kayaks together gets wet

Today we ventured out in kayaks on White Rock Lake.  We rented from the White Rock Paddle Company and  had a total blast.




Afterwards we went down to our trash pickup spot fearing that Trash Island might be back.  Lo and behold, it is not!  It is in fact very clean.  We were told that some kayakers who had been paddling here for years had never been able to get through until now.  They credited our efforts coupled with the rain.

"The Researcher," as we've called her, pulled up and was checking on the same thing.  We had time to talk more today and discovered she is from Shared Fuel.  Then fellow trash hauler, Bess Martin, pulled up on the same mission.  Talk about crazy timing!

I'm happy to see the island gone, but while on the water today it's obvious there's a lot more to be done.  I also noticed Bess got out of her car with a trash bag.  Because she's awesome.

Allison and Sary

Allison and Sary were married last weekend in a beautiful and intimate ceremony at the Dallas Arboretum.  When they first contacted me, they had the same hesitant voice that all small gathering planners have.  "It's not going to be a big or long ceremony.  There won't be a whole lot of guests.  I don't know if you're interested in those sorts of things...."

Well of COURSE I was simply overjoyed to accept!  I love small weddings.  I love non-traditional weddings.  I really appreciate the areas outside the box on (all things?) such love fests.  It was a gorgeous day for a wedding. Sary's tailored suit, skinny tie and fancy new haircut (I almost didn't recognize him!) were very handsome.  Allison's strapless gown, birdcage veil, lavendar roses and grandmother's cameo ring really showed off her style.

It was all lovely.  I am excited for their adoration for one another and honored I was there to photograph such a special wedding.

Marisa & Jacob

Marisa and Jacob had a fabulous wedding at the Filter Building.  I love the openness of the venue.  It's lake location gives a nice mix of nature and a clean urban feel with exposed bricks and lots of windows.  The green brides maid dresses were stunning and the rest of the decor followed suit in the same muted colors.  It was hot!  But not too hot.  Just enough to give us some fantastic blue skies to work with.

Thank you both for letting us shoot your wedding.  Congratulations and much love!























































Originally I was going to shoot this wedding solo.  But it was so close to losing Margot I wanted help. Just in case. I reached out to sweet Lynn Michelle, Can Turkyilmaz, and Ben Quintanilla.  They are all equally amazing and all agreed to help!  (Why was I the only one with a wedding that day?!)  I went with Ben because we've shot together so much before.  He knows exactly how I work and it was kind of a treat to be shooting together again.  But I want to extend my sincere thanks to Lynn and Can.  I know how hard wedding photographers work so I know how much I was askng for.  It means a lot that all of you were so kind and generous.