level committee desegregates conversations

last night ben and i were talking on the balcony about "the blog." i told him i had originally wanted to discuss all of the level 7 stuff. you see, when ben and i first started dating we had things called "couch conversations" (hours and hours of stimulating talk) that were all "level 7 conversations" (meaning of life stuff). i thought the blog would be a good outlet for me to get in writing how i feel about the important things.

at one point, ben had explained each level of conversation, up to level 7. i can't remember it exactly, but it was something like this:

level 1: the stuff you talk about with retail cashiers. not even conversation, really. just words that help you get away from the cashier:

example: "hi how are you?" "good." "that'll be $12.57. credit or debit?" "debit." "please slide your card. would you like cash back?" "no." "here's your reciept." "thank you." "have a nice day." "you too."

level 2: weather talk with people standing in line at the cashier.

example: "is it hot in here?" "yes it is. and this line is taking forever." "i think he's new." "he's cute though." "yes, and very polite." "look though, he has something on his chin." "looks like chocolate." "mmm, chocolate. will you hold my place in line while i get a candybar?" "sure." "thanks! be right back."

level 3: superficial girlie talk on the phone while you're painting your toe nails.

example: "so, there was this really cute cashier guy i met today." "really? what's his name?" "ted." "ted? that's not a good name." "why?" "i don't know. just doesn't sound good." "i gave him my number." "why?" "because he was cute. and he forgot to ring up my candy bar." "why'd you get a candy bar? i thought you were on a diet." "that doesn't start until tomorrow." "so what are you doing now?" "painting my toe nails." "what color?" "green." "green? why green?" "hold on, someone's beeping in."

level 4: purposeful talk that doesn't really mean anything. like work stuff.

example: "hey ted, i know you're new here, but i noticed the line is moving rather slow." "i can try to go faster, but i may have to scrimp on the politeness." "just do the best you can." "okay."

level 5: purposeful talk that does mean something.

example: "wanna have lunch together, ted?" "sure." "sorry i'm so slow. i'm a little distracted. i met a girl today." "really? what's she like." "a little pudgy, but cute and polite." "when's the last time you had a girlfriend?" "oh, been a while, i guess. i think i'll call her." "you should, ted. you're a real catch." "you think so? thanks."

level 6: intillectual college talk.

example: "i'm really having some issues with my weight. i think it's because i eat too many candy bars because i felt neglected by my mother when i was a child." "i think it's because we have a republican for president." "that too. all bad things can be traced to bush."

level 7: meaning of life.

example: "why am i here? is there a god? do butterflies matter? why are my toenails green? what does it all mean?" "because your mother got knocked up at 17 and neglected you. maybe. yes. because you're in financial distress due to all the candybar purchases. everything."

i don't think that's exactly right, but anyway . . .

alas, i told him, the blog has dribbled away into stories about my baby and my art and what i cooked for dinner. maybe because i don't have any more level 7's in me. maybe because i write after midnight. and maybe it is important.

ben tells me his recent realization that really validated these posts, and i thought i would share it with you as a reason/excuse i publish recipes for burritos on my blog. it's not all about level 7 conversations. i don't have to look for the meaning of life every day. my stories are level 7 stories because they are the stuff of life. they are my actions. they are the things that make me happy. they are important, and just because they will never be published, they may never be remembered, and i didn't use spell check, they are good and important as the air is sweet.

thanks ben.